Stukism

Seven Observations


Every once and a while a blogger just needs to throw up a post of random thoughts. None of these are worthy of posts on their own, but maybe they are interesting enough collectively.

  • I always get a little nervous when I pull onto a city highway and don’t see any cars behind me or before the next bend in the road. This happens sometimes on I-95 at Charleston even in the middle of the day. Each time, I catch myself wondering what everyone else knows that I don’t.
  • There are few things more enjoyable than watching a baby right on the verge of sleep. When I get to rock Cole to sleep, I love watching his eyes fight sleep until they finally succumb.
  • I wish I didn’t like Sheryl Crow as much as I do. I don’t usually get into that kind of music, but that lady can jam.
  • There is no group of people that I collectively despise more than the TSA. If it wasn’t for one buddy of mine that is a bag scanner, I think it’d be upgraded to hatred. I haven’t lost my temper in years and years, but each time I go thru the airport security I can hardly contain myself. They illustrate that “it is the nature and disposition of almost all men (and women), as soon as they get a little authority, as they suppose, they will immediately begin to exercise unrighteous dominion.” There is certainly a better way. San Francisco has a private company do security and it is a wonderful relief to travel there.
  • I believe that habitual tardiness is an external sign of a much larger internal problem. It will have an affect on how you run much of your life.
  • I have a strange habit of picking up on too-often used phrases. I’ve written before about this but I have another one. How come everyone starts their food orders with , “Can I get a…?” Next time you’re at an eating establishment, listen to others when they order. I don’t know why it’s so wide-spread. I prefer, “I’ll have…” After all, you are giving an order, not begging.
  • Did you know that the sheer size of Jupiter protects Earth regularly? The gravitational pull is so strong that it pulls in asteroids and comments that might otherwise make it further into the solar system and endanger us? This fact makes me feel small, but important. Tonight in your prayers, throw a little gratitude up for Jupiter.

Alright, I think I got all the little tidbits out of my system.

My Fatherhood Checklist


At the end of every month, I write what I call a “Thought Paper.” I pick out something that has been on my mind that month and get it out on paper. I’ve been doing it for years and it has been a wonderful thinking tool.

As you would imagine, this month fatherhood has been on my mind. What is expected of a father? How can I surpass the expectations?

I decided to write, “My Fatherhood Checklist.” In it, I listed six principles that I think a son should rightfully learn from his father. Mothers help teach these principles. So do school classes and church meetings. But my conclusion was that fathers should see to it that these six principle are taught and that a son understands them. Or to make it more personal for me, if my son doesn’t know these principles as he grows up, I am specifically at fault and should be held accountable.

My paper is long. Here is a summary of the six principles:

1) The Priesthood of God is a call to serve. It is to be used to bless and help others. Use it as the scriptures instruct. Accepting the Priesthood holds you to a higher standard. It is your commitment to serve when you are called as a missionary and in any other calling issued from the Church. God will bless you all your life and you have a duty to help bless others. Follow righteous Priesthood holders like the prophet and the twelve apostles.

2) Being wise with your finances will save you trouble and heartache. Work an honest job for your money. Always pay your tithing first, then your savings account, and then your bills. If you don’t have enough for your bills, change your lifestyle. A budget should be kept and money should be tracked. Schools don’t teach this, but it’s absolutely critical. Media will teach you to live on credit but debt is an incredible burden to have on your shoulders.

3) Pornography is as dangerous as a drug. Avoid it at all costs. When others may tell you it is “normal” or “healthy”, know that your father and your Heavenly Father are of an opposite opinion. Avoid it like you would a deadly disease. It teaches disrespect for women and portrays an inaccurate view of the world. It makes you idle in progression. If you do slip, find help from me or your bishop as soon as you can.

4) Respect women. Treat them with kindness. Even in the hard times, always be respectful. This applies to all women, not just the ones that attract you. And more than any others, respect your mother and your wife.

5) Patience is a prized characteristic. Do all you can to learn it. It will make you a better father, a better leader and a better person. It will save you from being both offensive and offended. It will help you control your temper. It will allow you to lead in times of emergency or uncertainty. The more you are patient, the easier it is to do.

6) Learn from history and the experience of others. Learn to love history. There have been so many people who have succeeded and failed, learn from them. Read how cities were created and destroyed. Learn about intelligent and successful women and men and absorb their characteristics. Read The Book Of Mormon and the restortation of the Gospel thru Joseph Smith to see how God deals with His people. When you rub shoulders with giants of past, you become one in the present.

There is a lot more a father should teach his children, but these are the six that I chose as absolutely critical. If from no where else, these principles must come from the father. I’d love to hear what’s on your list.

Have Favorites But Don’t Be Picky


I think it is important to determine your favorites. Find things that you really enjoy. Partially because I think it will help you know yourself better. But also because it helps you build relationships with others. It’s always fun to know what others enjoy and it gives friends and family a reason to think about you.

For instance, anytime James Taylor is on the radio or the Rebels win a big game or Apple Computer comes out with a new product, I can guarantee that I’ll get a call from someone to talk about it. That’s fun. Likewise, I have certain people pop in my head any time I see Willie Nelson or peanut butter or Hot Fries or Oompas or chocolate covered cherries or big trucks or Dirt Cake. It’s fun to have random things bring up good memories of someone you care about. It gives you a reason to reach out to them.

However, the danger of favorites is that you might be too picky and afraid to try new things. Be careful with that because you might just like the next thing more and it will become your new favorite. You might just like balut more than Oreos. (I didn’t.)

I guess I’m just surprised how often people haven’t determined their favorites.

Two Phrases That Help Me Everyday


There are two phrases that really help me everyday. They help me to be more patient and long suffering. They help me to better understand others. They help me to have the courage to stand up for what I believe. They help me build self-confidence They help me to be more thankful for my blessings.

What are those two phrases?

“Kindness doesn’t always mean weakness.”

“Loud doesn’t always mean right.”

Stukism: You Never Regret Paying More For Quality


One of the recurring lessons one will learn thru life is that you never regret paying a bit more for quality. I’m not talking about paying more for a brand name. Often, brand names and quality have nothing to do with each other. I’m just talking about quality in general.

Quality lasts longer, usually give a better experience and encourages you to take better care of the product. It may be hard to spend the extra money up front, but in the long run, you’ll always be glad you did.

(With this post, we start a new category called “Stukism”. In it, you will find little phrases of things I learn and live by. I’m not promising good advice, just putting my label on it so you know where to come if you don’t like it.)